Social Interaction and the Internet

I find it very fascinating to read more about the Internet and how it relates to relationship development (both romantic and friendship connections). I have always been one to be very skeptical about the Internet and what it is used for. I primarily started to use the internet for email, which I think was quite common for people from my generation. Later on, in university, we were exposed to using the Internet as a research tool. Professors gave us assignments for which we were expected to do some of the research on the Internet. However, I was always very critical and almost suspicious about the information I found: “who wrote this?” and “how do I know this is reliable?” were the questions that always ran through my mind. Over time, the Internet started to be part of much more than just email and sporadic research for me. I started to use it to research everything that I wanted to know more about, to learn about the world, for banking, for communicating (SKYPE) and for social networks (Hi5 and Facebook).

Even so, I still consider myself a very cautious person when it comes to the Internet. I don’t like to post too much information about my life on Facebook and I definitely limit my profile to the friends that I select and accept. For me it’s an issue of privacy and I am not comfortable with who has access to this information. The recent backlash against the new Terms of Service (TOS) by Facebook confirms this privacy issue, and today I have had five of my friends change their status to show support against this new term. Some have removed all their information from their profile and are protesting for their rights. A group called “People Against the new Terms of Service” was established on Facebook which has about 840 wall posts already since only yesterday afternoon. Check it out at http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=77069107432 And for more information about this new policy check out this article http://news.cnet.com/8301-13772_3-10166290-52.html

With this example, one can stop to really ponder the question: How does the Internet affect Social Life? Bargh and McKenna’s article “The Internet and Social Life” addresses the issue of how the Internet is affecting relationships. They mentioned that there is agreement about the fact that the Internet is affecting our social life, however, the extent of this impact (positive and negative) is something that is still argued by many.

The article noted that some critics argue that Internet usage can cause alienation and loneliness and that it hinders building relationships. However opponents of this idea, and surveys conducted show that Internet users are no less likely than nonusers to visit or call friends on the phone, or that Internet users actually have the larger social network “the Internet allows people to stay in touch with family and friends and, in many cases, extend their social networks…” [Howard et al. (2001)] Furthermore, it was found that most people don’t use the Internet as a substitute to face-to-face relationships, but instead, to supplement/maintain them (especially long distance relationships).

I have to agree with the last point because this has been my main experience with the Internet and relationship building/maintaining. When I lived abroad, I used the Internet as my main communication tool to be in touch with family and friends. From here, I depend on the Internet to keep in touch (or to maintain) my relationship when my husband travels (as I mentioned in a previous blog). And for my husband, whose entire family and many of his childhood friends live abroad, this is his main tool for him to keep in touch. At different times, and in different ways, the Internet has allowed us to not only maintain, but also to strengthen long distance relationships.

Further in the article the authors talk about two factors about the Internet and interpersonal relationships. The one that I found quite interesting was the fact that many relationships can be quite anonymous on the Internet. Kang (2000, p. 1161) notes that anonymity can actually contribute to close relationship formation by reducing the risk of self-disclosure, “Cyberspace makes talking with strangers easier. The fundamental point of many cyber-realms, such as chat rooms is to make new acquaintances. By contrast in most urban settings, few environments encourage us to walk up to strangers and start chatting. In many cities, doing so would amount to a physical threat” (p. 582) Even though I agree with Kang’s comment I think that the anonymous nature of the Internet has also brought quite a bit of hesitation, resistance and even problems. Since one can easily disguise their true personality and appearance (among many other things) it leaves people with TRUST as the only way to navigate the Net.

As our discussion followed in class, TRUST involves a leap of faith. And as we outlined,
there are various antecedents of trust formation. The two that spoke out to me the most were “Third-party trust” and “Dispositional history-based trust”. Reputation and experience play a big role in how/what I decide to participate in online. Even so, I believe there are times when I am taking a chance because in reality, you just don’t know who you are dealing with. As we were asked to think about the questions “How aware are you of online trust situations and what cues do you use?” the group that I worked with, and most of the members in the class felt that reputation plays a very important role in your Internet experience. Therefore, like in offline relationships, TRUST is something very hard to gain, but once broken, it is even harder to get back. And the great thing about the Internet is that people are generally very clever and quick to let the world know about their bad experience. It is up to the individual to stay objective and to make their own decision. And as noted earlier, Facebook’s TOS policy seems to have tested, if not broken, many people’s trust. Below is one wall post from the group “People Against the new Terms of Service”

Chris wrote at 6:31pm
This could completely destroy the social networking sites, if the changes are gonna stat I will be deleting my account and switching to a social network that is not gonna lay claim to my life. I truly hope that Facebook wakes up and realizes this is a huge mistake. What if every social network did this? Who would still post and share info/images/videos?Let social networking live!

Clearly people are taking this very seriously, and joining in unison to stand up for what they believe. The Internet makes this much easier and faster to do.

I also found another very interesting website that belongs to Chris Pirillo and one of his YouTube videos in which he addresses the question: Are Social Networks Destroying Offline Relationships? Here’s a quote that really stuck out to me from his video:

“I have more in common with guys from Ireland than with people who live down the street. You can develop genuine relationships.” Being connected across borders allows us to meet people with which we may have more in common than our best friends and family. Proximity and geography are not longer barriers for such friendships.

Check out his YouTube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSguQjQ256U and website http://chris.pirillo.com/